"Home-Wrecker" Laws & The Power Of The Innocent Spouse

A question that I have raised in the Jones v Pollard case, is
exactly who is the victim?

Certainly there is a cleric predator, sex addict, preacher, and a manipulated and manipulative woman that have stood up both claiming that they have been treated unjustly. While, from all available evidence, it is clear that the accuser, Ms. Pollard was treated unjustly during her younger and adolescent years, and clearly used as a sex object, by an adult, male pedophile and pervert. What is unclear is the level of abuse that she actually suffered over or during her adult years and just how much she may have contributed toward her condition over that time. Both of them, the abuser and the abused, claim to have been treated unfairly and wrong by one another if noone else. 

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Take Charge: Black Women HIV & AIDS Awareness

Saturday March 10th was National Women & Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day. The alarming facts are that within the United States, women constitute 25% of all new HIV infections annually. If that weren't alarming enough, out of that 25%, Although Black women only constitute 14% of the United States population, they are approximately 60% of all new HIV infections among women. When compared to less technologically advanced sub-Saharan countries within Africa, such as in the Congo (0.28%) and Kenya (0.53%), the American numbers become especially alarming. 

According to The Huffington Post Black Voices, the HIV Prevention Trials Network (HPTN), announced results from its HPTN 064 Women's HIV Seroincidence Study (ISIS)  stating the following findings among 2,099 women ages 18 to 44, 88 percent of whom were black:

• 1.5 percent (32 women) tested positive at the outset of the study, even though they all thought they were negative. 
• Among those who initially tested negative for HIV, the rate of new infections was 0.24 percent within a year after joining the study.

Additional statistics are as follows:

• More than 290,000 women in the United States are living with HIV/AIDS. Studies show that women tend to face greater gaps when it comes to accessing care. 
• One in 32 Black women will contract HIV/AIDS in their lifetime. 
• Black women constitute 13 percent of the total AIDS epidemic.
• Heterosexual Black women have the second highest rate of new infections behind only gay and bisexual men. 
• Black women contract the disease at 15 times the rate of white women

Quite naturally, this leads to questions of rates of incidence among black women in particular. 

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Rihanna ~ "Man Down", BET & Parental Duty

This is the opening part of the new Rihanna "Man Down" video which was originally aired on BET last week. In this part, the character played by Rihanna, kills a man in the response to the man's actions which were revealed in the end of the video which I will post as time allows. In the later part of the video, we discover that the character played by Rhianna, killed the man in response to a rape, or sexual assault. Rihanna claims not only does the video offer a "positive message" for those "like me" , but she also claims that  these type of images empower women who would not otherwise speak up. The question is, is that so and do her assertions have any bearing on reality?

Pt. 2 ~ The reason for the murder (what appears to be rape or sexual abuse)



Rape, Sexual Abuse & A Higher Standard 

As I have stated, we understand the seriousness of this issue. Sexual abuse, rape and molestation are not subjects to be minimized or overlooked as being problematic within the secular or church world. The problem, however is vigilantism as portrayed within the video in exchange for the hurt and pain. In this video there is no healing and there is no call to a higher moral standard by anyone, rapist or victim. This video is simply a display of cold and calculating revenge where the realization is that someone has lost control and a mother has lost a son. What is not identified, is that humanity has lost it's value all together.

The Push-back

A group known as the Parents Television Council, along with the public decency advocacy groups called Industry Ears, and  the Enough Is Enough Campaign has deemed the video as inappropriate stating the following:

‘Man Down’ is an inexcusable, shock-only, shoot-and-kill theme song. In my 30 years of viewing BET, I have never witnessed such a cold, calculated execution of murder in primetime. Viacom’s standards and practices department has reached another new low,”...“If Chris Brown shot a woman in his new video and BET premiered it, the world would stop. Rihanna should not get a pass and BET should know better. The video is far from broadcast worthy,” ~ Paula Porter spokesperson PTC former BET voice

Another PTc representative stated the following regarding the video and it's presentation and ultimately its purpose:

“Rihanna’s personal story and status as a celebrity superstar provided a golden opportunity for the singer to send an important message to female victims of rape and domestic violence. Instead of telling victims they should seek help, Rihanna released a music video that gives retaliation in the form of premeditated murder the imprimatur of acceptability. The message of the disturbing video could not be more off base,” ~ Melissa Henson, director of communications and public education PTC.

The BET Angle

Rihanna's video premiered on BET, which allows us to further ask does BET even like black people? The reason is that not only does this video provide a controversial response to a very serious subject, the question has been raised does it actually violate the media standards claimed by the Viacom media giant as declared through their CEO of BET , Deborah Lee. Mrs. Lee stated in the following interview that she (BET) had to be the "grown up in the room" in denying opportunities for the airing of certain video imagery deemed inappropriate for television such as material by Kanye West and Ciara and others and particularly the "women" of Hip-Hop fame.

Mrs. Lee, has also vowed to set forth a better image of the Black Community in general in the following interview:

Rihanna's Response

In Response to all of this Rhianna has claimed the following:

"I'm a 23 year old rockstar with NO KIDS! What's up with everybody wantin me to be a parent? I'm just a girl, I can only be your/our voice!" she wrote early Thursday afternoon. "Cuz we all know how difficult/embarrassing it is to communicate touchy subject matters to anyone especially our parents!... And this is why!Cuz we turn the other cheek! U can't hide your kids from society,or they'll never learn how to adapt!This is the REAL WORLD!... The music industry isn't exactly Parents R Us! We have the freedom to make art, LET US! Its your job to make sure they don't turn out like US" ~ Rihanna to critics

Certainly the pain of teh past experiences cannot be denied and Rihanna has not been healed in any sense from her past beyond Chris Brown. The problem is that not only does Rihanna blame parents for not being attentive to their children's needs, she takes absolutely no responsibility for how your child interprets anything that she does or says, whether it is in video or music. In addition she claims that it's the parents job or duty to make sure that your child doesn't turn out "like US", indicating that there are more in the industry messed up like she is. 

Question: Does any sane parent need Rihanna to make that pronouncement? Is there any sane parent on the planet who would like their child to aspire to BET imagery or the imagery as seen in the modern entertainment or hip-hop industry? 

To me, this all adds up to even more reasons to avoid this industry or any association with it (as in hip-hop gospel) When the industry and artists are only given to money, wealth and fame at the expense of their own audience, and without any responsibility of the message, it's a dangerous and sad day. We've known this all along, but now the artists speak for themselves. 

Blessed!   

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Public School Condom Distribution, Does This Disturb Us Anymore?

Washington DC and New York City, NY are the only 2 cities in the United States that allow condom distribution directly to students within the public education system. A May 2010 Washington Post blog story on DC's condom practices stated that the primary complaints from students regarding the condom distribution program was that state sponsored condoms were either "not large enough" or that getting them  from grannies and older individuals was problematic.

On one hand we are faced with the fact that young people are having sex and teen  pregnancy and diseases continue to proliferate. On the other hand we know the harmful effects of premarital sexual activity as well as the negative results and psychological effects of sexual experimentation.

It begins for many with disease and the resultant fallout from disease. In DC it is estimated that out of 600,000 residents  3% or 18,000 have HIV or AIDS. I have spoken on the real costs associated with HIV/AIDS in particular in my post "HIV/AIDS & Health Care Reform, What Do We Really Know?"

Here are some further facts:

• In Washington DC 57% of students are sexually active and not taking advantage of school condoms 
• DC Health Dept. distributed 3.2 million condoms in 2009 including 15,000 to students in schools
•  For 2010 about 2.5 million condoms distributed to the general public so far (pace of 4 million by year end) We can expect school distribution to follow suit accordingly. 
• 2009 city cost for condom distribution:  $165,000
• Estimated 2010 cost: $228,000 to $276,000 (depending on brand and size).
• In 2010 teachers will be able to distribute condoms directly to students however a teacher must complete ongoing education and  a "WrapMC" or Master Of Condoms certification. 

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The Legacy Of The Modern Church

Time To Air Some Dirty Laundry

The 21st Century church is undergoing a modern metamorphosis of epidemic proportions and if it were not for the prayer of Jesus:

Lk. 22:31-31~ "31-And the Lord said, Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired [to have] you, that he may sift [you] as wheat: 32-But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren."

The church and all believers would certainly be without hope.

If it were not for the promise of God, I would also be confident that the mutations that we see are irreversible. Why? Because what is emerging does not look like, act like, taste like or even smell like what the apostles and early church died for and what the pioneers of the faith contended for. In fact what is emerging doesn't even resemble any part or type of the dedication that the church had 50 years ago.

Pt. I: Pastor, We've Advanced So Much

Yes we have made our advances in the 21st Century. As noted in my post What Does 21st Century Holiness Look Like?, we as a people, now look better than ever. We live in better homes, we are more mobile and more adept on an array of issues. We are regular thespians in our Platonic and Socratic understandings of the world in which we live. We have made progress in networking, information exchange, systems upgrades, ecumenical ministry target marketing and all, but at what cost has this success come? What has the church paid in return for many of the advances that we have made? Has it cost us a debt that we cannot pay?

One only need to look around to see why I'm even asking the question. From leadership on we seem to be

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For All Those Who've Been In The Struggle

Special thanks to my friend and ministry associate brother Enochwalked for directing me to this article from WorldMag.com. in response to my article Yes We Can ~ Eliminate Abortion. Can't We?

I must confess I fell in love with this lady pictured to the left...and she IS NOT my wife.....Now before I start a scandal on myself, you need to know that the love was and IS a godly and pure love and happiness for someone's success in Christ and spiritual commitment.

You see, I was just overwhelmed with the mission and glory of the Lord upon the life of Mrs.Tijuanna Adetunji. This lady, Mrs. Adetunji, not only grew up in the projects, not only had one abortion at age 17, but she had a second abortion at age 25.

What made me so glad to know her by way of this article is that she didn't stop there, and her mistakes didn't end her life. This young lady allowed the Lord to pick her up, dust herself off and is now used in the ministry service of the Lord along with her husband in restoring the lives of other young ladies who are now caught in the same traps and are considering making similar choices in life.

For Those Who May Feel They've Failed

In this particular post, I wanted to take the special time to acknowledge that we often preach messages of what we should do or what we're supposed to do. That's in order and the TRUTH must be preached. However, I wanted to take special time and thank all of those reading this who have at one point in their lives failed, but REFUSED to be a victim of either their failures of the failures of others that were placed upon them.

Now, we must confess, abortion is murder, homosexuality and lesbianism are abominations, and choosing to be a single parent is certainly an unwise move. BUT for those who have been in those situations, relied on God for help and deliverance, and have done the best that they could with the help of the Lord, I want to COMMEND you. I commend you for not settling there or being satisfied with those mistakes or situations that you were dealt. I want to commend you for holding on to God or getting to know God and becoming and being part of the solution to the serious problems that we face and see everyday.

You see, I am aware of young ladies and men who were molested or inappropriately handled at young ages and have consequently struggled with their sexual identity, desires and intimate relationships. In our MLK Jr. Holiday celebration our special guest Dr. Bill Cosby spoke of a lady who was molested in her youth and became promiscuous her whole life and went on to give herself to crack cocaine and eventually was so depraved that she sold her daughter to pay for it. Thank God she recovered from this horrific circumstance, but she still has intimacy issues with her spouse, and it's a day by day journey for her. The truth is that some people never recover from such circumstances. Some people loose their minds and their life, but we know that only Jesus can truly heal a broken heart.

I am aware of some mothers who were married, had children while they were married and were doing the right thing, only to have their husbands walk out on them for another woman, leaving them a single parent, to deal with school and daycare situations, find a job and pay the bills in many cases without help. Still, for others the Lord saw fit to call a spouse home when the children were young. I know that wasn't easy by any means, and people who didn't know the situation were quick to lump you in with others who didn't hold to the moral standards that you did. I know it was tough. Those situations are breeding grounds for disdain and utter contempt. BUT YOU MADE IT with the help of the Lord!

I know it wasn't easy. I know you had it hard. I know there were things in you that you wish weren't there, or didn't realize was there because of what you've been through...BUT, I know as you found that Jesus came to heal all wounds, and you didn't stay where you were. Thank you for finding that LIFE is worth living.

John 10:10 ~ "The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly."

I guess I simply wanted to say that I am godly proud of all of our godly women who have taken the ashes that were given to them and allowed God to exchange them for beauty.

Isa. 61:3 ~ "To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified."

For Those Who Currently Feel The Weight Of Their Burdens

Whether it was your fault or the fault of others who placed you in whatever situation you're dealing with, you too can have the same relief and gain the same purpose in life that Sister Adetunji and countless other godly women have. No matter how you got into the situation that you're currently in, God is able to heal your heart, use you for his glory and cause you to be an example and valued treasure to the community.

Why You Are Essential To The Purpose

I attended a School board meeting this week to fight to help keep a high school from closing. After I spoke to the board there was a young lady who took the mic. She said she was a foster child and had never had a stable home in her life and the only thing that she had that was stable and the same everyday, was her school and the people in her school that had helped her change her grades from D's and F's to A's and B's. She explained that these people were there for her and had her back. Yes, she admitted that they were tough, told her the truth, and wouldn't let her slide, but she acknowledged that she was fortunate to call the school HOME. She questioned why the board would take her HOME and her STABILITY from her.

I cried, at her testimony, and I further thought, when will the church truly be HOME for hurting people? There are thousands of these young ladies in every city wanting someplace to simply call home and needing somebody to simply be there for them.

The truth is they're not looking for a place to party, nor a place to socialize but a place where they can bring themselves which includes their frustrations and failures and leave it all at the alter of the Lord's mercy and receive the power to be what they can't be on their own...You see, they want to be told the truth without manipulation, because some of them realize that otherwise they've been lied to. They want to be loved on for who they are, not for what they can perform and ultimately be shown out of their current conditions into a new life and way of living.

Heb. 4:15-16 ~ "15-For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. 16-Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.

When will all these things be?

As my friends, the group Commissioned said some time ago...Well, the time is now, and the day is today!

I just had to share this word of encouragement with you. For those who have aborted a child and realized the error and grievous mistake, give it all to Jesus and take what you now realize and heal these other young ladies and men of their ills.

For those who have become overwhelmed in promiscuous behavior, sexual sins and or homosexual sins...you too can be free and washed of those sins and the burdens of guilt beneath the flood of the cleansing blood of our Lord and savior Jesus Christ. Confess, repent and commit your heart and ways to HIS care. I simply believe and know that Jesus is coming back...and I want to meet all of you on the other side...Well, here too, but surely over there!

Psalms 51:7-13 ~ "7-Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. 8-Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice. 9-Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities. 10-Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me. 11-Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me. 12-Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit. 13-Then will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee."

Blessed!

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